by Aaron Begay, California Men’s Colony State Prison in San Luis Obispo, CA
What you decide to put into life is what you’re eventually going to get out of it.
For me, it was the moment I decide that I was going to put everything I believed into living life of crime and selling drugs at a young age. That itself would eventually have me living behind bars, and because of that the only thing I got out of it was 15 years to life in prison.
Growing up as a teenager that came from having nothing and coming from growing up in the Foster Care System as a child, basically moving from house to house and then eventually ending up in a group house. That it was going to eventually lead me to living a different path in life. I did not realize that at the age of (15) fifteen years old I would end up choosing to want to sell drugs and engage in a life of crime over the one most important thing that mattered more to me than anything else in the world. Because I felt like that was the only way I was going to be able to survive and get by in life, was by selling drugs in high school at fifteen years old and running the streets all night. The reason for that was because I never had any kind of parental support or love because I didn’t have my mom and dad there to support me or care for me.
Since I grew up in the Foster Care System, not having any type of support was the reason why I decided what I was going to do with my life. That kind of decision was something that not too many teenagers would even think about, but I didn’t have my mom or dad so that’s why I did what I chose to do.
I was also blinded by hate, anger, selfishness and greed. It led me to start blaming my mom and dad for every mistake I made as I got older and anytime I got into trouble I would always say that my parents were the reason why I did what I did because they were never in my life when I was growing up. Not having their support is what caused me to lose the love and support I had from my old sister and from the rest of my family.
At the time, I didn’t realize what my parents were going through. I didn’t know that everyone in my family just wanted the best for me and they were willing to love and support me no matter what happens. But I eventually lost their love and support because of the hate, the anger, the selfishness and the greed. These things are the things that blinded me from seeing the love and support that I had from my family.
All of these things happened because I decided to live a life that eventually lead me down a road that no teenager should ever think about living because this is what you will get out of it. You’ll have the choice to live a better life for yourself and your family. You, just have to make better decisions for yourself. This is not a life you want to live forever because you will lose your family.
I didn’t understand at first that the decisions I was making were affecting my family because I never took the time to see the damage I was causing until it was too late. Because of that and everything I’ve done the only thing I got out of it was fifteen years to life in prison.
I now make it a habit to put my best effort into rebuilding my relationship with my family because they want what’s best for me and I owe my family everything because I took the most important things from them. That was me. Family is everything and you can lose them at any time. Love and cherish them every day because they will always be there for you no matter what.
This is the beginning of the journey of my life.