The Beat Within

by Richie Angulo, Avenal State Prison in Avenal, CA A few months ago my friend Mark recommended the book, “Healing The Shame That Binds You,” by John Bradshaw. It’s rare that a self-help book catches my attention, however this book turned my life upside down (in a good way). Reading this book allowed me to connect some dots from my past that I desperately needed. Author Bradshaw distinguishes between healthy shame as an emotion versus toxic shame that can become an identity. Unfortunately, I allowed toxic shame to consume my life and strip me of the man I was supposed

by Efren Bullard, Ironwood State Prison in Blythe, CA I gave everything I got when I walked away from that old negative life style. I gave up friends that I knew since I was a child. I gave up hanging with them because I understood that nothing will ever come from violence.  The moment I walked away from negativity my whole world opened up to new adventures. I began to see myself free one day. I didn’t care what people had to say about me because this is my life and I’m the only one who can live my life.

by Flo, San Quentin State Prison, CA I never gave much thought to the reason why I enjoyed the company of others as an adolescent. For as long as I could remember I have always been this extroverted social butterfly. I was both a good student and class clown. Even in serious discussions I can conjure a joke. I was an entertainer. On the surface it seemed pretty healthy. There was no real harm in that, no signs of dysfunction right? However, there were a bevy of underlying issues not realized.  I was in an abusive household. Fear, lead me

by Jose “RawRaw” Robles, Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, CA Playing Cops and RobbersNo more time it has expiredDaylight shines the night retiredNo more waiting in the shadowsThe light retreats it is that hourBack and forth in night and dayHide and seek the game we playNo more tag and now you’re itNow it’s toe tag if you’re hit.For My MommaA mother’s love for her childUnconditional true and pureEven as a grown man with flawsHer eyes look at me with tender patienceBecause I will always be her childThough she can no longer carry me in her armsAs when I was