Greetings! Another week another Beat! Welcome to The Beat Within’s latest double issue, 27.19/20! Where is the time going? 2022 is flying by, as the summer months are now upon us. As for this latest issue, there is plenty of wisdom, art, and thoughtful writings for all of us who are so privileged to pick up and be a part of this one-of-a-kind publication. We could not do this work without you contributors if you are simply reading the magazine or coming from the heart as a writer and artist. Let’s cut to the chase and pass the keyboard to our dear friend and colleague, OT!
This is OT reporting live from the hot climate and muggy skies of Managua, Nicaragua. First and foremost, I hope that by the time this magazine lands in your hands that you are in the best of healthy mentally, physically and spirituality.
I must go ahead and address something that’s been bothering me for quite some time, because as a parent, as an uncle, as a brother, and as I concerned person in general, this issue is something that affects people world-wide, but more predominantly in the United States of America. Even though I currently reside in Nicaragua, all my sisters, my nieces, nephews, friends, and family reside in the San Francisco area, and I have a few friends in Florida too.
As always, everyday I’m in-tuned to the news of what’s going on in the United States of America. I can’t say that I’m astounded by all violence that goes on in the country, after all I contributed to this problem the moment, I decided to join a negative lifestyle as a youth.
See, at a very young age, I was one of those people that thought I needed a gun everywhere I went. And I will be quite frank, if you’re a gun owner it’s because you may feel that your life is in jeopardy or feel that you will be put into a situation where it may be life or death, or you want to protect your family from burglaries, intruders, or anyone that may be trying to harm your immediate loved ones.
At a very young age, I started seeing violence. I grew up in the projects right by Candlestick (as well as in the Mission District) because I used to play baseball at a young age and that’s where we would practice, at the little park right across the street from “The Stick.” That was the heart of Hunter’s Point. My best friend, Mario, at the time, lived on Third and Ingerson and at one point, I practically lived there. I would be there every weekend, sleep over, have clothes at his house, and during the San Francisco summers, sometimes I would be there all week.
We would see people get shot, fights and shoot-outs between different sets in the point and my other friends who would live in the Mission District were normal. At some point during the early 1990’s there was a lot of gun violence due to drugs, gangs, and the crack epidemic. I remember being ten years old, and some guys pulled out a gun on us trying to rob us and we ran, and all we heard were gun shots and fortunately none of us got hit. We were all ten or eleven at the very most.
At the time, we were just doing normal things that normal kids would do, which was play the seasonal sports, baseball, football, etc., and ride around our bikes in the streets. We would be out all day, looking for the other kids in the neighborhood that wanted to get a football game going on the black concrete.
It would always happen. Our friends would always consist of mainly Latino, African American, and maybe a couple of Pacific Islanders or Asian youngsters. We all vibed with each other because we were all sports fans, that loved our home teams, the 49ers, Giants, and Warriors. None of us at the time partied. Since parties with the adults (our parents) were wildly popular, sometimes when all the adults fell asleep drunk, we would get mischievous and drink the left over beer, but it was never more than one or two cans.
Playing sports was our daily ritual. It was an all-day thing. Baseball in the morning, basketball after lunch, and football in between 4pm and whenever the sun would set; And if the lights were bright enough on the street, we kept playing till late night.
In those days, you were respected if you could catch a football, throw it real far, cross-over and shake and bake someone on the court, or get a base hit and steal second and third base. And arguments would break out and sometimes there were fights, sometimes rumbles, but as a youth no one ever thought about bringing a gun onto the scene.
That was until we kept getting older and we started seeing friends pass away from senseless violence. I remember one of our basketball peers, I’m going to keep his name anonymous being shot five times and dying for no reason at the age of fourteen. He was caught in a crossfire.
So, gun violence was already an epidemic in the early 90’s, and still today nothing has seemed to change. Growing up around this violence I then realized that a gun was needed for protection. I quickly resorted to guns for protection. I always used the excuse that I was protecting my family and loved ones, but really, I was protecting myself. I knew what the consequences were being a part of the streets and I viewed it as a tool to help me survive.
However, that particular tool, is something that I would get caught with continuously throughout my lifetime. I would eventually catch cases, and the consequences of packing firearms would eventually lead me to prison and then Nicaragua. I’m not going to lie and say that at times it may have saved me from some life-or-death situations, but when you live by the gun, you die by the gun.
I was willing to live my life okay with that. But at what point do we decided that it’s okay to keep living a life where you constantly watch your back with every step you take? Many of us sometimes trap ourselves in our minds and when you’re involved in the streets, your anxiety and stress cause you to start creating these scenarios in your head where now, it’s like you feel like you need to be Max Payne.
The reason why I’m addressing this is because there is too much senseless violence in the world. Too many children, and let me repeat that, children are dying by the gun. Things are out of control. It wasn’t like that when I was growing up. We didn’t have active shooters in the 90’s like nowadays or at least from my re-collection.
This is sad folks. As we sit-back and witness to see if lawmakers will pass laws about the accessibility of guns, many of us should all do our part and try to refrain from picking one up. After all, you can protect yourself with your bare hands, or find other methods. As a firm believer in self-protection and to some extent I support the use of legally caring a firearm, I’m starting to believe that it’s no longer necessary. What would our communities be like without guns? Ask yourself that.
I know it’s impossible to imagine, but if we all decided to go against the grain and do what’s right, our communities, our children, everyone would be a lot safer. Today, I no longer feel the need to carry a firearm. Today, I kind of get disgusted when people come bragging to me about their firearms, knowing that that same tool, that I used to heavily believe in as protection, is only a tool of death and destruction. There’s only one thing that gun does and that’s fire a bullet to kill.
There’s no protection in that. It’s a tool used for destruction and ruining lives. As many of your readers mature and get older, I hope you stand for what is right. Peace is hard to find. But there’s always more than one way to solve a problem. I’m not here to tell anyone what to do, but just imagine if it was your son or daughter or mother or grandmother or father that was a victim to some senseless violence.
Hurt people, hurt people and this world we’re living in today just keeps getting a bit worse. But we the people have the power to make it better. Make the right decisions. Stand up for what is right, and remember one day, many of you youngsters reading this will have your own kids, and you will need to decide what kind of world that you want for them.
I believe in you young folks that you will do the right thing because you are the future, but there will be no future if you all decide to keep participating in gun violence. I felt like I needed to address this because too many valuable lives keep getting lost. I don’t want it to happen to any of you. This message goes out to everyone that has lost a loved one to gun violence. Stand strong, have faith, and stand up for the right cause.
One love to everybody going through the struggle. OT is signing out with utmost love and respect to all of you! And The Beat keeps going….
Thank you, OT for your most timely editorial note. Our thoughts and prayers also go out to the children and families of Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas.
Enjoy this latest issue, stay in touch with The Beat Within if you are moving on, we’d love to hear from you. Please know there is always a place for you in the pages of our amazing publication.