by Gucc, San Mateo
The life of Gucc is crazy. The heart of Gucc is gone. Being me has been a hard job. Ever since I could remember my life has been hectic. My pops was a demon so he birthed a red-rum child. They kept it real with me at a young age. They told me I’ll probably get killed by my right hand man. I’ve seen how being in jail everyone leaves you for dead. Sometimes I feel like I could have gone to the (professional sports) league, but the court I went to, as they are tryin’ to send me to the pen instead.
Real talk! Being me is hard because I’m real and if you’re not real then you probably don’t know how hard it is to stay real when you’re surrounded by the fake. But, what keeps me being me is something I always tell myself, “Hard times don’t last. Solid people do.”
Growing up being me, I was shy, only with females though, I never liked being around other dudes and was never afraid to tell them that either. But females, I was scared of them. The girls would have crushes on me and I would like them too, but I didn’t have any game, so I would call them ugly when I was trying to flirt. Needless to say, they weren’t feeling that.
As I got older and started getting money, I earned my respect from being fearless. My confidence went to all-time high to the point that I became cocky. Now the only problem I have with females is only having one at a time. Being me, I had to fight a lot. I have never been scared to fight, anybody can vouch for that, but I feel like it’s a waste of time. I’m trying to refrain from it now.
Being me you can’t care, but not caring is hard to tell you the truth. You know how much easier life would be if I could just break down whenever times got rough? But I don’t. I suck it up and that’s part of the “slime mentality.” My family hates one of my famous sayings, “It is what it is.”
My mom keeps telling me, “It is what I make it.”
But I believe that if life was how I made it I wouldn’t have no problems. I feel like I have minimum control of my life. It’s like being at an amusement park. I can pick which seat I’d like to sit in, but I can’t control where the roller coaster goes or how fast it goes.
But, back to bein’ me, to be me you have to be resilient. You can’t be vulnerable. These type of people are taken advantage of. I’m not saying I was just born slime, but my life’s experiences made me slime. When I noticed how slimy other people were I had to adjust my morals.
I know you shouldn’t stoop to other peoples’ levels but sheesh, sometimes you have to. Being slime (mainey, grimy or greasy) you can’t wear your heart on your sleeve. As a matter of fact, just grab your heart from your chest and find the nearest trash can and go throw it away because you don’t really need it.
A lot of people are going to doubt this question and just flat out not understand. But I’m going to let you know that once you get shocked a certain amount of times, watch the people you love die, go to jail forever, or simply just walk out on you, your heart is going to turn cold and you’re going to notice yourself becoming slime.
It’s not just losing yourself. It’s just not caring enough to care. You just simply won’t understand until you’re able to understand. I know there’s a lot of paradoxes in what I’m saying but if you turned into slime you would understand what I’m saying.
Sheesh, being slime is hard. Being me is hard. Life don’t be making sense. I didn’t want to turn out like this. I’m just being Gucc. Till next time.