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I just sit and think of my past and I’m like dang, what a waste of life. Nothing but the same thing everyday. Running and scared of what?
One day on November 1st, I woke up so happy like always and it was just a normal day for me. Just like every day and I wanted to go to my best friend Alric’s house so bad to get Wi Fi for music and Facebook. So I went to his house.
I remember the last words I told my mom and my brothers were, “I love you mom I’ll call you when I’m ready too-The-Clouds!!” I gave my mom a kiss on her cheek then I walked inside. As I was walking in I kind of felt this weird vibe, like God was trying to tell me something but I didn’t know at the time. I walked in my best friend’s room. He said he just bought a gun and he showed me it. I said, “that’s what’s up.” He started loading it and asked me if I wanted to shoot it. I said “no just wait til it’s darker outside,” but he wasn’t listening to me. So I asked him “Yo!! Let’s Rap?” He said alright, but as I asked him that he was already waving the gun everywhere. He fired one shot out his window.
by Clarence Reese
My life has known sunshine, has known rain.
A life of little joy linked to an abundance of pain,
Washed in a bird bath of tears I have caused to be shed,
Who blew out the spark leaving no light up ahead?
Roaming, cold, sweaty, walls of ink dripping tattoos and raw scars,
Why do memories fade into dreams lost upon waking up behind bars?
Near the shadow whose figure leans tilt, it has slip
Sways handicap, without a mast, my life, a handicap ship
Drifting in a sea of waves far from home, far from port,
Toss by mistakes, the current is strong, the anchored to your support.
Stand, not I alone, for I alone would fall.
In our shadow I find comfort in behind your protective wall.
In the dust trampled under countless feet,
Is a life with no hope on its road to greet.
Never lost for your sister are a compass in my life,
A hope that dulls life’s unrelenting knife.
On the edge where I’ve lived and pitched my tent,
I thank you, sister, for the love and care you’ve not relent,
As I ask and reach at time for more than you can spare,
I, thank you, for your sacrifices and support which make life easier to bare.
I need some motivation. Maybe some inspiration. I feel like I’m in NYC and the police are choking me, I can’t breathe or conceive, as I run down the street with my hands up, bullets flying I think they’re hittin’ me.
My mind turns to when I was twelve years old, playing in the park with my BB gun, can’t you see the police are killing me, as me, she, and he become we, not for the right reasons, but just for the season.
My days locked up feel so long.
Drifting on a memory can’t believe you’re gone.
I miss you with all my heart.
I wish God, would have warned me from the start.
What did I do to deserve this?
I didn’t even get one last hug from you.
Oh baby, God took your love from me.
I need to see my angel so it seems.
It’s hard, to keep on living this way,
I need you here with me.
Why did he take you away from me?
There is nothing that I wouldn’t do,
I’d lie for you.
I’d cry for you.
‘Cause it’s hard for me to tell you, I love you.
As I’m standing over your grave
‘Cause I know I’ll never hear your voice again.
Why did you leave me?
Why couldn’t you just stay?
Because my world is nothing without you.
I just can’t look at your picture in my bin.
Knowing it was just one year ago,
You stood there and took that picture.
There’s just one thing that I want to know
Why would God want to hurt people so bad?
Does he know how much it hurts, to be missing you?
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