Category: The Beat Without

by Ray Sanchez Jr., Mule Creek State Prison in Ione, CA Not so long ago, a friend of mine earned his parole. I say “earned” because he did not just sit and wait for his time to run out, he actively sought to change himself and enrolled in activities that not only helped to shorten his sentence, but also improve his life.  He did not begin his life, “working hard”, or with a will to “give it back,” as Hank Aaron admonishes us to do. Quite the opposite. He was a young black male, and he was exposed to a

by Efren Bullard Prison Yard in Centinela State Prison I found that quote and thought it would be nice to share it with some people who could really use something different in their lives.  We all have said, “I wish I could go back and do this or that, or relive my life?” Time and life doesn’t work like that. We can never go back and change what has been done. So, when you make the choice to rob someone what you are doing is forever changing that person’s life and your life forever. When you make the choice to

by Leo Cardez, Correctional Facility in Dixon, Illinois Why it is so important as inmates to reclaim our joy, especially now, post 2020. As prisoners, the holiday season can be an especially difficult time of year. We are shaken from our self-induced delusion of contentment to the harsh reality of our forced separation from our loved ones. As if that wasn’t enough to unmoor us…COVID-19.  The epidemic has been devastating to the inmate community in ways seen and unseen. Beyond the unnecessary suffering, fear, and deaths are various underlying side-effects including a slow mental and spiritual deterioration of our shadow

by Samuel “Shady” Cruz, Centinela State Prison in Imperial, CA My turning point in becoming sober came in 2016 when I almost lost the 2 mothers of my kids one in an accidental overdose with pain pills, the other same thing. I’ll be truthful with you; the first one Josephine is the one who our son Rudy died in 2012 and as mother she has taken it truly hard and I do understand. If it wasn’t for our daughter coming home early and noticing her mom’s breathing was not quite the same as usual and her face blue and not

by Noel Rodriguez, Calipatria State Prison in Calipatria, CA I grew up in Watts, South Central, Los Angeles, CA., where we were poor. I migrated from Mexico. We were homeless. We would sometimes live in a car- father, mother, brother and myself. We spent about ten years living and renting a room in some family’s home. While my father worked hard to provide for us, my mother would take us dumpster diving for aluminum or bottles (glass) to sell to the recycling company. We would use that money to eat and pay rent. It was not a lot of money

by Frederick Mason, USP Tucson in Tucson, AZ Today, November 24th, I woke up in my cell, in B2 unit USP Tucson, at about 7am as I heard the breakfast trays coming. I got up, reminded that just yesterday, November 23rd, that 18 inmates in B2 tested positive for the COVID-19 virus and had to be moved to B1 along with their property, except their mattresses. In exchange B1 sent 30 inmates who had not tested positive into B2, since the remaining 75 of us had yet to test positive. Dorms hold up to 128 inmates. Once all the switches

by Keith Erickson, Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, CA There was this boy. He had been harmed as just a child by the very ones that were supposed to love and protect him. They had failed him in more ways than you can imagine. He was, like many of the men that now fill these prison walls of despair and disdain, broken before he ever stood a chance. If you knew his past, their past, you would see the world around you with deeper compassion than you ever thought possible. Their stories, our stories are real.  The tattooed faces,

by Dortell Williams, California State Prison, Los Angeles County in Lancaster, CA I supposed that it is rare for a man cured of toxic masculinity to admit that he was the domestic enemy of the house. Especially when domestic violence is all too common in today’s society, and yet now I speak out against it. I wish I could say that I evolved to a place where I was mature enough to just get it without having ever harmed a soul. But regretfully, I didn’t fully understand until after I had committed grave harm, falling as low as one can

by Richie F. Angulo, Avenal State Prison in Avenal, CA When you were growing up, who was our worst enemy? Was it the neighborhood kid or the school yard bully? As I reflect on my life, I remember very well that I was always hiding from my worst enemy. It didn’t matter if I was in school, playing baseball on the field, or at the store with my parents, my worst enemy had a way of keeping me on my toes. I was afraid, always on the move. I needed to be one step ahead of him. So you’re probably

by Charles Reece,  San Quentin State Prison, CA April 21st, 2020 at 9am I was transported to Marin General Hospital for my long overdue prostate surgery that I had been waiting on for twenty-two months. I should have been given the surgery no later than one month after discovery of the prostate cancer in June of 2018. A prisoner is never transported to outside medical facilities more than thirty minutes before their appointment for security reasons, therefore my surgery should have taken place no later than 10am but didn’t. The two guards and I arrived at the hospital five minutes