Category: The Beat Without

by Terkesha Lane, Federal Detention Center in Miami, Florida This is not a letter due to my current circumstances of being in prison. I have always felt this way about my children. Year after year, the older they became, I fell more in love with them. Their personalities, different but interesting moods, little quirks, the craziness (which I’m sure came from me) just the small things most people would not notice, like how they change when they are sleepy, different study habits, the educational subjects each of them liked or disliked, even how they arranged their clothing closet.  Yes, I

by Chad Fitzpatrick, Correctional Facility in Moose Lake, Minnesota I recently watched a movie on T.V called “Freedom Writers.” It’s about a teacher who encourages her sophomore English class who many are from the inner-city and are gang members to write in a journal every day. It didn’t matter what it was they wrote or how much they wrote as long as they wrote in it every day. They would not be graded on it nor would they be read unless they wanted her to read them. Every time I see that movie it inspires me more to keep on

by Ray Sanchez Jr., Mule Creek State Prison in Ione, CA Not so long ago, a friend of mine earned his parole. I say “earned” because he did not just sit and wait for his time to run out, he actively sought to change himself and enrolled in activities that not only helped to shorten his sentence, but also improve his life.  He did not begin his life, “working hard”, or with a will to “give it back,” as Hank Aaron admonishes us to do. Quite the opposite. He was a young black male, and he was exposed to a

by Efren Bullard Prison Yard in Centinela State Prison I found that quote and thought it would be nice to share it with some people who could really use something different in their lives.  We all have said, “I wish I could go back and do this or that, or relive my life?” Time and life doesn’t work like that. We can never go back and change what has been done. So, when you make the choice to rob someone what you are doing is forever changing that person’s life and your life forever. When you make the choice to

by Leo Cardez, Correctional Facility in Dixon, Illinois Why it is so important as inmates to reclaim our joy, especially now, post 2020. As prisoners, the holiday season can be an especially difficult time of year. We are shaken from our self-induced delusion of contentment to the harsh reality of our forced separation from our loved ones. As if that wasn’t enough to unmoor us…COVID-19.  The epidemic has been devastating to the inmate community in ways seen and unseen. Beyond the unnecessary suffering, fear, and deaths are various underlying side-effects including a slow mental and spiritual deterioration of our shadow

by Samuel “Shady” Cruz, Centinela State Prison in Imperial, CA My turning point in becoming sober came in 2016 when I almost lost the 2 mothers of my kids one in an accidental overdose with pain pills, the other same thing. I’ll be truthful with you; the first one Josephine is the one who our son Rudy died in 2012 and as mother she has taken it truly hard and I do understand. If it wasn’t for our daughter coming home early and noticing her mom’s breathing was not quite the same as usual and her face blue and not

by Noel Rodriguez, Calipatria State Prison in Calipatria, CA I grew up in Watts, South Central, Los Angeles, CA., where we were poor. I migrated from Mexico. We were homeless. We would sometimes live in a car- father, mother, brother and myself. We spent about ten years living and renting a room in some family’s home. While my father worked hard to provide for us, my mother would take us dumpster diving for aluminum or bottles (glass) to sell to the recycling company. We would use that money to eat and pay rent. It was not a lot of money

by Frederick Mason, USP Tucson in Tucson, AZ Today, November 24th, I woke up in my cell, in B2 unit USP Tucson, at about 7am as I heard the breakfast trays coming. I got up, reminded that just yesterday, November 23rd, that 18 inmates in B2 tested positive for the COVID-19 virus and had to be moved to B1 along with their property, except their mattresses. In exchange B1 sent 30 inmates who had not tested positive into B2, since the remaining 75 of us had yet to test positive. Dorms hold up to 128 inmates. Once all the switches

by Keith Erickson, Pleasant Valley State Prison in Coalinga, CA There was this boy. He had been harmed as just a child by the very ones that were supposed to love and protect him. They had failed him in more ways than you can imagine. He was, like many of the men that now fill these prison walls of despair and disdain, broken before he ever stood a chance. If you knew his past, their past, you would see the world around you with deeper compassion than you ever thought possible. Their stories, our stories are real.  The tattooed faces,

by Dortell Williams, California State Prison, Los Angeles County in Lancaster, CA I supposed that it is rare for a man cured of toxic masculinity to admit that he was the domestic enemy of the house. Especially when domestic violence is all too common in today’s society, and yet now I speak out against it. I wish I could say that I evolved to a place where I was mature enough to just get it without having ever harmed a soul. But regretfully, I didn’t fully understand until after I had committed grave harm, falling as low as one can