Facing My Problems and Moving On

Piece of the Week

by Nikk, Santa Clara Personally, I put most things behind me relatively easily, simply because I understand that I can’t change the past or what I have already done, only what I’m gonna do in the present and future. This doesn’t mean I don’t have regrets or wish I could go back, and occasionally these thoughts and feelings will resurface.  And it is human nature for this to occur and to self-blame. But at some point, after beating yourself up over something, you just have to realize that it’s not doing anything or changing anything other than affecting your mental

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Pandemic of Hopelessness

The Beat Without

by Chad “Get Right” Fitzpatrick, Correctional Facility in Oak Park Heights, Minnesota What do you think of when you hear the word, “Pandemic?” I bet the first thing that comes to mind is COVID. Right? But what about hopelessness? Does that even cross anyone’s mind when they hear the word, “Pandemic?” Probably not, why? Because people don’t see hopelessness or if they do they don’t care or even just don’t know how to treat it and slow it down like we did for COVID. Have you ever felt hopeless about something to some degree or another? I sure have, even

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It’s Been A While

The Beat Without

by Efren Bullard, Ironwood State Prison in Blythe, CA I know it’s been a while since my last letter, but I’ve been hard at work trying to regain my freedom. The court has granted me an attorney under 1170.95 for resentencing and so far, I’ve had three court dates and the next court date is this month May 18th, 2023. As I pray for everyone at The Beat Within and all the incarcerated youth, please do the same for me. We are on the Step #10 of CGA: “We continued daily to take personal inventory of ourselves, and whenever wrong,

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Ed Note 28.17/18

Editor's Note

Hello to our Beat Within readers, writers, and community members. We’re here with another stellar issue of this publication, made possible by the hard work and passion of the many writers, volunteers, and editors that we’re blessed to know and collaborate with. We’re always in awe of the depth, vitality, and authenticity we encounter each week by engaging with the work of our youth. This issue’s editorial note comes from our Program Associate, Alyssa Maanao, who has hosted workshops all over California, and currently is the lead facilitator for Sacramento County, as well as does many other things to keep

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What Money Can’t Buy

Piece of the Week

by Patricia, San Francisco  Family to me is one of the most valuable things in this world. It’s what money can’t buy that makes me the happiest. Something priceless and so cherished as what family is. It’s the love so deep no one else can give you. Blood is not what makes the family. It’s how far you’ll go for them, the loyalty and trust given to one another, your other halves, and many strong, unbreakable bonds.  I have a younger brother and sister and mom and dad. But I consider so many more people in my family. My sister,

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The Costs Of Loving Someone

Piece of the Week

by Ishmael, Santa Clara  What’s up, Beat Within? How y’all doing? I would be better but I’m on C-level, which means I can’t socialize or call my family. But how do I move on from stuff? How do I put stuff in the past? See, I don’t really get over stuff. Well, I do, but it takes me a while because I feel like if you do something to me once, how will I know you won’t do it again? You really have to prove to me that you won’t do it again, but I won’t forget it.     

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Best Family Memory

The Beat Without

by Chaser, San Quentin State Prison, CA I don’t know if I have a best family memory but I have a lot of good ones. One memory that I look back on and smile is when we went to the Santa Clara County Fair. We were living in a small one bedroom house near Downtown San Jose. We didn’t have a lot of excess money at the time or even a car. I think my Dad won the tickets to the fair from a contest on the radio, either way, we got the tickets for free.  So we woke up

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Best Family Memories

The Beat Without

by Hugo Arredondo Ortiz, San Quentin State Prison, CA The days I miss the most are those when I was happy watching my brother kick a soccer call. Helping my sister with her homework, and my familia on holidays with the music so loud our neighbors are with us until midnight because they’re downing a fresh beer with their tacos.  However, the days I miss the most are watching my family (my son, my daughter) open their birthday and Christmas gifts. Those were the most surreal for me. There I was, wondering how/when did this happen. Seeing their smiles for

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