by Lil Bane
Forgiving is hard, especially forgiving ourselves. I’ve always been the type of person to hold grudges and make silent moves, but when it comes to forgiving myself I just can’t do it.
I feel like the reason people believe in God is the idea that God can help them forgive themselves, but God has abandoned me.
So many choices from my past are coming back to haunt me every night. It’s like I’m living in a horror movie. I can never forgive myself for the things I’ve done since a young age. The streets swallowed me and turned me into something or someone I’ll never be able to forgive.
I wish I could forgive myself and be at peace with myself, but that’ll never happen the way I am living. Maybe one day I’ll stop carrying heat and selling dope, I just hope that won’tv be my last day. Until then I guess I’m just a child of the ghetto.