Down But Not Out

by Eddie “Edito” DeWeaver

There have been many times in my life where I felt that I could not go on. It seemed, with my short-sightedness, that there were outside forces in my life that were overwhelmingly greater than me.

There were times in my youth that I felt like nobody cared about me and I would isolate myself by hiding away in a closet to cry. For some reason, I believed that life should be fair, and as a result of feeling powerless, I would not want to go on in this world. In these closet appointments, I feared to be caught in the act of crying, because then I would appear weak. Ironically, for someone who was tired of this unfair life, I sure was concerned about living.

For a lack of trust, the closet was a space for me to be vulnerable with myself. My short-sightedness became a source of stress and anxiety about the future.

Years later in prison my mother told me a saying that impacted my life. She said that when she faced overwhelming obstacles in her life, she would remind herself, “this too shall pass”.

At twenty- ve years old, my perception on life changed as she had identi ed an error in my thinking pattern. As I re ect on this gem of wisdom, I look back upon all of the many times that I felt I could not go on, when I felt I was at my lowest, when I was completely surrendered to my problems, or when I thought that my world was crumbling to an end. I can now see clearly that these circumstances did not defeat me forever. The admonition, “this too shall pass,” is to recognize that life goes on and it releases positivity into your life as you can turn your focus from any immediate turmoil and be inspired by your long-term goals for your future. Never forget that you may be temporarily down, but not out.